The pause has started turning into an uncomfortable silence.
I could hear her take a big breath.
“I hate to admit, but I’m jealous! Or maybe, it’s not so much that I am being jealous of what she has accomplished as much as I am frustrated with where I am”, she spoke softly.
That took guts to admit, and I told her as much.
Although, I instinctively wanted to tell her something that would make her feel better about herself, my job in that moment was to help her see things from a different angle.
Our conversation mostly kept circling around things like:
- She has hundreds of comments on her blog. People must absolutely love her and the service she offers.
- Oh, wow! Now she’s sold out of her 5K course out too?!
- Crap, she looks like a model for god’s sake! No wonder she has all these clients!
- OMG!!!! She has hundreds of testimonials. Am I ever going to get there????
Any of the sound familiar?
Plagued with resentment. Am I the only jelly-fish around???
Many times in my consulting sessions, women find themselves at the point where they are struggling with this type of resentment, and the truth is, it’s not such a big deal why you’re there, as much is it what do you do about it.
First off, it sucks to be there.
And second, it doesn’t get you any closer to where you really want to be so STOP doing it immediately.
How to stop being jealous and what you can do instead:
1) Get inspired
Look at the competition to see what is possible and get inspiration from it.
Use their achievements as your guides to targets that now you see are possible to reach.
In 1954 Roger Bannister broke the record for the 4-minute mile running distance. After that, the four-minute barrier has been broken by over 1400 male athletes – after they saw someone else do it became “possible” for them too.
Use what’s most bothersome, what you think really makes you jealous about the whole thing, and use it as a goal for yourself.
2) Shift focus
Stop blaming competition for your lack of sales.
Understand that anything you tell yourself and others is just an excuse no matter how you label it.
Because it is not the competition that took your sales, you did it by failing to adapt and grow.
But as of today everything is different.
You need to take the focus off of them and shift it onto you, and start measuring your results, since you can only improve those things that you can identify and measure.
The only person you need to be better is you from yesterday.
Focus on you and only.
3) One foot in front of the other
Keep taking steps no matter how small – every day.
It’s not the wrong steps that hold us back. It’s the inaction.
And since there is no such thing as a status quo – if you’re not moving forward, you’re falling behind.
It does not matter much if you take the wrong step. Then you’ll know it’s wrong and correct.
Just don’t let the time pass you buy 😉
Apply this little 3 step hack and get rid of the resentment holding you back from advancing to your success. Instead of letting it slow you down, use it to light up your path and propel you a step closer to your goals.